This is my story of adoption, search, and reunion. It starts from my perspective as growing up knowing that I was adopted, and how my environment shaped my view of my adoption. I go forward into searching within and without for who I really am. Blossoming before you is my journey, search, discovery, and acceptance. A full on embrace.
Monday, May 29, 2017
All The Buzz
At the time that I messaged LeRoy and his daughter, I'd also messaged another woman who I thought may be a relative as well. Chloe lives in South Carolina, and she carries the last name of one of the ancestors on my tree, one of LeRoy's aunts. Chloe also responded to me via Facebook messaging. She came across warmhearted and friendly. She said that LeRoy's aunt was her great grandmother. I was thrilled. I'd found another cousin, even though I didn't know how. She then procured the help of other family members. I've got to say, that at this point she was treating me like a lost puppy that needed a home. That's how I felt. It was strange and demeaning. Perhaps I was misinterpreting her sympathy.
Chloe enlisted the help of her former NFL player brother, Greg. They seemed like a well-meaning team. They even involved LeRoy in their search, as he is the senior statesman and could recall the year and time in which I was conceived and born. My name was buzzing all through the family. I'd become a "tea time" conversation. And, everyone wanted to know "which family member would do such a thing?!" (Insert the tone of someone disowning their sweet puppy. Ugh.). During the next two weeks following the 4th of July I was on conference calls with LeRoy, Chloe, Greg, LeRoy's daughter, and Bobby (The family historian of this group of branches). We were going in circles. We could not nail the bull's eye. We were having a hard time figuring out if they were related to me through my biological mother or my biological father. I felt so close and yet so freaking far. And then, things got weird...
As we were struggling with figuring out how I was related to them, I was getting confused by my family tree. There were some baffling relationships. They'd be hard to explain here without confusing you into tears. The more I continued to work on my family tree, the more it resembled a tangled ball of yarn. My new team knew something that I was not privy to. Unbeknownst to me, I'd walked into the midst of a deep family secret...
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